Deception and Perception

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by Maria Grazia Swan

I spent some time with an old friend who is an Internet dating aficionado.

He dates often, but never seems to go out with one woman more than a couple of times. It occurred to me he could offer some insight into the Internet sins most often committed by our sisters.

Right away he said, “Women fib about their appearance. Don’t take this the wrong way. It’s not about looks. It’s about deception.”

I reminded him the two most common lies women tell are about their age or weight or both. You put the two together and it is easy to imagine the results when a man comes face-to-face with his date for the first time and she’s twenty pounds heavier and ten years older than he anticipated.

My friend and I sat together waiting for the power to be restored so we could finish a project we were working on. We had time on our hands, and nothing to do in the meantime. Why not gather more information?

“When that happens, how do you react?” I asked.

“It depends. Sometimes, I move on without a second thought. There have been times, I felt like I lost an old friend because the lady and I were so connected while communicating on the Internet. Once I asked why?”


“She told me she gained twenty pounds in the last week because she was nervous about meeting in person.”

“Did you believe her?”

“No. You may gain some weight. I say some, probably not twenty pounds. But you definitely don’t age ten years.”


Maria Grazia Swan ( is an author and motivational speaker who shares relationship advice and guidance for mature women re-entering the dating scene. Maria empowers and encourages single women to be bold, fearless, and sexy in their pursuit of life and love after age 45.

An award recipient from the Women’s National Book Association, Maria Grazia Swan is the author of Boomer Babes: True Tales of Love and Lust in the Later Years (Leisure Books) and Love Thy Sister (Zander Books). Her short story, “Bohemian Rhapsody” is included the anthology, Medley of Murder (Red Coyote Press).

Maria is working on her new book, Old Flames Burn Hottest. If you have a story to share, she wants to connect with you! Join her Facebook page and learn more.

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